A Sad Goodbye and A New Beginning

On Wednesday, Dec. 12th, I had my last dinner with my homestay family. We ate pumpkin soup with olive oil for the primo piatto. Then we had carne con funghi and really good spinaci. (Believe it or not, my homestay sisses are eager to eat spinach.) Then we had ciambellone that my homestay mom had made. It is a chocolate/vanilla marble cake and it was soft and moist and good.

They have a guestbook where all of their homestays before me wrote them a little something. I noticed that all of the other entries had a picture of the person in them and I was wondering how my Italian family had gotten pictures of everyone. Then at dinner, my homestay sis G brought out the camera to take a picture of me. I told them that they could have a picture of me if I could have a picture of them. What resulted after that was a photoshoot in front of the Christmas tree. When they send me the pictures, I will update this.

After, they gave me a little present- a necklace with the symbol of Firenze on it in viola. I told them that purple is my favorite color! They were like that's great, but more importantly, viola is the color of Firenze's soccer team. I gave them a mini glass penguin family, which they seemed puzzled by, and some chocolate, which they were thrilled about.

On Thursday, I had my last two finals. I don't think that I did too well because I was so sad that it was my last day. In the morning, it snowed a little bit. I had been praying for it to snow before I left, and for a few moments as I was walking to school, my prayer was answered.

Later that day, I had to leave my Italian family for good. Only my Italian mom, my homestay sis M, and my cat were there when I left the apartment with my suitcase packed. M was sad in a desolate way. She kept hugging me and leaving was truly one of the saddest things I've ever had to do. I never thought that I would be an emotional wreck over leaving a thirteen-year-old. I love her, and all of my Italian family, very much.

I had to go to the final dinner with at my school right after that. I was barely keeping it together, but it was good to get to say goodbye to everyone. That wasn't as sad, because I will probably be able to see some of these people again.

And after that, I took the train to Rome. I was crying as I left my city. When I got to Rome, I had to take a taxi to the airport because the shuttle had stopped running. I was pleased that I was able to talk to the taxi driver in Italian. I (sort of) slept at the Rome airport until I could check in for my 7:45am flight. From there, I flew to Spain. And from Spain, I had an eighteen hour flight to LA. I went a little crazy being trapped on a plane for that long, not gonna lie.

Flying over Antarctica

I was welcomed back by my mom, and soon after, by my family. It was nice to be able to hug them, after seeing them on skype for these months and not being able to. There were goofy "Welcome Back" posters at my house. And I took the train up to my university to surprise my sorority sisters. It was awesome to be attacked with hugs.

So I don't know how I'm feeling right now. I can't help but compare everything to Italy and I don't think that I will be able to help starting my sentences with, "When I was in Italy..." for quite a while. I want to let my love for Italy, and for the people that I left there, make me stronger. Italy is always going to be a part of me now, just like my family is a part of me, just like my sorority is a part of me. And I'm okay with that. I know that I am a different person than I was before, and I am glad for it. I had the strength to fly across the world, alone (okay with God too), and I loved it. I am ready for my next adventure.

(I really am going to miss Cat, though. I love her. Even if she clawed me sometimes when she got excited.)

"...for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away." 
~ Song of Songs 8:6-7

Last Song

Does listening to Italian music count as studying for my Italian final?

This song is "Due Respiri" by Chiara Galiazzo, and she just won the Italian X-factor. This is also the last song that I will ever get to awkwardly sing with my Italian class. :'(

"Open my heart and you will will see / Graved inside of it / 'Italy'." ~Robert Browning

Monastero di S. Maria Maddalena de' Pazzi

One thing that I like about going to school in Italy is that we go on a bunch of field trips! Learning outside of the classroom makes a lot of sense to me. 

In my culture class, we've been learning a lot about saints and Catholicism. For our field trip, we went to a convent of cloistered nuns last Thursday! We met with three nuns. Two of them spoke only Italian and one spoke some English. Our professoressa translated for us. 

At the convent with my class [Photo Credit: Lisa Kaborycha]

One of the nuns told us that she had joined the convent when she was in her teens. Her parents had opposed her decision at first. However, then she got sick and her family came to her and they were reconciled. 

The one who spoke English was actually a nun-in-training. She looked like she was about 50, and she emphasized that she had had a full life. She said that she had traveled to many places and that she had many friends, some who still came to visit her. She looked at peace and like she was where she was meant to be. She did not wear a habit because she was not yet officially a nun. She had been there six months and eventually she will get voted in (or not). 

It reminded me of my sorority and the pledging process. But the idea of committing to live with the same people for the rest of my life is terrifying to me. But then, that is what people who marry do, too.

I shared my insight- that I'd decided I didn't want to join a convent- with my friend. Her response was, "You sure?" Why I befriend the most sarcastic people, I don't know. But I like it. 

Anyways, these were Carmelite nuns, and they were a cloistered order. That means that they do not leave the convent. If there was an emergency (like if one of their family members became deathly ill) then they could leave, but beyond that they stay in the convent. They spend most of their time in solitary Bible study, in prayer, in meditation, and in contemplation. There are other monastic orders that are not cloistered and that do things like go out and feed the homeless. So the nuns that are here chose this lifestyle purposefully.

There is church that connects to the convent, and it houses the body of Santa Maria Maddalena de' Pazzi. I saw her and I was able to see her more clearly than any of the other dead saints that I've seen. Yep, she's dead alright. The nuns were saying that her body still does miracles. I'm skeptical about that. I think that that's something I'd have to see to believe.

A nun we met [pic from nuns' website]

If you want to know more about these nuns, they have a website (naturally): http://maddalenadepazzi.jimdo.com/

Be forewarned that the site is in Italian, so you may need to google translate the page.

It was cool to do something that I may never have gotten to do otherwise. The "I Will Follow Him" song from Sister Act may or may not have been playing in my head during the visit.

"I will follow Him, / Follow Him wherever He may go, / There isn't an ocean too deep, / A mountain so high it can keep, / Keep me away, away from His love..." ~ "I Will Follow Him" from Sister Act